Epp-ic Thoughts: Week 3

Kevin Epp

Kevin Epp

Feb. 11, 2013

Junior Kevin Epp shares stories, knowledge and general lacrosse team news in his weekly blog entitled "Epp-ic Thoughts." The second entry is now available below.

Epp is a two-year letterwinner and long stick defenseman for the Black Knights. He made his way to West Point from Naperville, Ill.

Army Lacrosse fans, welcome back to week 3 of the blog!

Last week I went over the most popular nicknames on the team. A few of the folks mentioned in last week's blog will be mentioned again this week as I go over one of the most crucial aspects of team chemistry ... on-the-road roommates.

This week was our first away game, and with that came the news of who the new roommates would be. A few pairs stayed the same like Sam Somers and Evan Danahy, but all of us who had senior roommates last year knew we would be getting new ones. Fingers were crossed, tensions were high, and the results are in.

Brendan Buckley and Austin Schultz
Buck was ecstatic to hear that Austin would be his roommate. Apparently Brendan requested this matchup due to the fact that he wants Austin to be his next protégé. The only problem is, Brendan incessantly debates about how many more Tinder matches he could get than Austin, which Austin doesn't take too kindly to. Brendan also likes to have debates about the validity of the String Theory and it's relativity to modern Physics, which Austin does not have the time for on Saturday nights because he is too busy on the phone with his frat brothers from Beta Gamma Echo Lambda Kappa: Alpha chapter. Needless to say, Austin has said a total of three sentences to Brendan since he became his roommate; the only person whom Austin speaks freely to on the team is Tom Shade. While studying his scouting report, Brendan caught Austin repeating cadences in his sleep.

Marc Pesa and John Sabert
Probably one of the most questionable decisions to date is to have these two room together. When I walked in the room they were splitting a cheesecake and discussing their favorite flavor of Combos. Their room looked like an episode of Hoarders and is probably the closest look that humanity can get to what Cro-Magnon life was like thousands of years ago. A couple of the fellas on the team said they caught them eating with their bare hands, but as far as I know that information is unconfirmed. Saturday night, they received complaints from the room next door for blaring sirens and jumping on their beds, when in fact it was just John snoring.

Tyler Kamide and Nick Isnardi
This room celebrates the little things. This week Tyler and Nick were celebrating the A- they each got on their recently graded coloring books. Nick enjoys punching holes in walls, while, to my knowledge, Tyler plays "Fun Run" and "Llama or Duck" on his phone and watches reruns of Shark Week with Nick.

John Burk and Sam Finney
The amount of testosterone in this room is second only to a Samoan Rugby team. Sam allegedly cried, once, and used his tears as engine oil. John's chest hair has been woven into life vests. The Dodge Ram "Farmers" Super Bowl commercial is a loose interpretation of their adolescence. Supposedly, John and Sam do pushups for professional development and sleep in sweat suits to boost morale before games. Next week's game plan is to go on a grapefruit diet in order to test mental toughness.

Garrett Thul and Will Mazzone
Everyone on the team saw this matchup coming. These two are like father and son. This Saturday, Garrett taught Will how to head butt correctly and gain followers on Twitter. When Will got really tired, Garrett read him Gates of Fire until they both fell asleep.

Highlights of the Week

-Jimbo D'Aprile killed it on groundballs at UMass.

-Mr. Burk has a truck that can pull a Greyhound bus out of a ditch apparently. Very Impressive.

-Connor Cook scored his first career goal.

-The chicken parm after the game was prime (shout out to all the parents who helped with that).

Hope to see you all this Wednesday in our home opener against Manhattan.


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